Paul G. Thompson

My entire life, there has been a wonderful man/influence in my life. the biggest thing i remember from him when i was little, was how much he cherished his wife. he was never not by her side. he was her protector, and he just adored her. my grandma and grandpa never came out of the honeymoon stage, and they were married over 50 years before she passed away. even when they were driving in the car, i never remember a time when my grandma would sit in the passenger seat. she was always in the middle so she can be touching my grandpa. they have always been the cutest couple together.then my Grandma passed away, and the fear of losing my grandpa started to sink in. since the death, i have always had nightmares every once in a while of having to look down into my Grandfathers casket. a sight that i have never wanted to see.

but somehow he has made it ten years now. and also, for some unknown reason, my grandpa has also never aged above 60 years old max. he always said he would live to be 110, and end up being shot by a jealous husband. even just a year ago from now, he was running around Europe with all us young'uns. and was keeping up pretty well.

when i was younger, my dad would call him every night(or he will call my dad) and as soon as i heard "hi Pappy" or "how bout them jazz" i would have the strongest need to talk to my grandpa. i would jump out of bed, and run to the side of my dad's bed, and hold out my hand. if dad wouldn't give me the phone, i would just take it so i can hear grandpas voice tell me that he loves me. it was always so much easier to go to sleep after i got to say hi, and i was reminded with how much i loved my grandpappy.

whenever Grandpappy would come into john paras, i would meet him halfway to the office, and give him a big hug and kiss and he would get this shocked look on his face and say "boy, is this how you greet all your customers that walk thru the door?" and i would respond with "nope, you the only one." his face would always light up at that.

my grandpa was also incredibly sensitive. the story that he was telling, didn't matter if it was an army story, and funny story or one of my grandma, those tender eyes would always start with the water-works. same was when he was talking about something important.

but something terrifying has happen within 12 months. my grandpa has aged from his young 60 year old self to a dying 82 year old man, and i don't see how it has happened. and now more then ever i am scared of having to look down on his sleeping body for my last goodbye before he is buried beside my grandmother. i love him so much, and i wish with all my heart that i can hold on to him forever and not let him go. but there comes a time that everyone has to let go as well. i am having a real hard time letting him go, now that he is down to the final paragraphs of his life's story.

a month ago, i had myself convinced that if he were to pass on, i would be OK. yes there would be tears shed, but i would also feel better knowing that he is no longer suffering. that he no longer has a broken heart from living without his soul mate. but now that he is at this point, i cant let him go. i want another thanksgiving at his house. i want him to come over for Christmas just to complain that we got him gifts. i want to get more birthday cards with the special $2 bill that has my age in the serial number. and most of all, i want him at my wedding, sitting with the rest of my family as i marry my love, my partner, my best friend. i want him to be there when we have our first child and i get to place the little angel in his arms. i want my kids to grow up knowing such a wonderful man.

with his health, and his age, i know that there is a very slim chance that he will even make it another month, let alone years from now. and i know i need to cherish every moment and day that i do still have with him. as of this moment, he is at the university of Utah hospital, and not doing very well. the doctors are saying if all goes well, he may be released Sunday, as long as he has 24 hour care. he lives with my cousins Catherine and Theresa that can take care of him most of the time, and for the times that they can not be there with him, my wonderful sister will go up and stay with him and make sure everything is OK. if that doesn't work, he will be brought up to my parents home to stay and be looked after.

my grandfather is the most wonderful, loving man i have ever known. he has one of the biggest hearts and there is always more room to go. he always makes you feel important when your with him, and he is always reminding you how special you are in this world. he is also always there to encourage you in everything you do, and is never afraid to stand up for what he believes in. He is my hero.

i love my grandpa so much. my life wouldn't have been so wonderful if he hadn't been such a big part of my life. i never would have witnesses such admiration for your spouse, or tried so hard in school so he could tell me how proud he was of me, or about the three C's of marriage, or any of my important lessons from him.

i love you Grandpappy!!!!!